Halloween Recap // Snippets

So Halloween has become one of the top social occasions at BC, right up there with Marathon Monday and football gamedays. We've talked about it, and it's interesting what happens to Halloween throughout the lifetime. As a young kid, it's definetly a huge event: as a real young one, you don't really know what's going on; throughout elementary school, it becomes cooler and cooler and peaks during the years when you start trick-or-treating without an adult supervisor. We remember fondly the days when our parents would trail at a "cool" distance to be sure we didn't get hit by a car, get abducted by the notorious Halloween kidnappers, or eat any candy without sufficient wrappers. But that Halloween rolled around, I'm thinking sometime around 4th or 5th grade, when everyone else was allowed to go out alone and your parents were still sending a trailer. "Real bush league, Mom" we would say. Parents totally hampered the experience, preventing anything involving eggs, silly string, etc. It also ruined the chance of sprinting from house to house, a style of trick-or-treating which maximizes candy collection and is huge for bragging rights. Halloween was at its coolest for those few years, (which should end at about 8th grade), when we trick-or-treated alone and wreaked havoc all throughout town. We would hit up the neighborhoods most notorious for attracting the cool kids, where nice mothers in witch hats would give out candy liberally, and every few houses we might even get a king size Butterfinger.
With junior high and high school, Halloween became less and less of a diversion. We weren't allowed to go trick-or-treating, and we were too old for Halloween parties at school. Although Thayer Academy has one of the best Halloween costume contests in the prep school circuit, the thrill of All Hallow's Eve just wasn't there anymore. Then came college. The excitement and revelry of Halloween was back. Costumes were more important than ever, and Halloween grew from a one night outing into a weekend long extravaganza. It's a totally different experience. The girls' costumes are usually a tad bit risque- because of this excessive showing of skin, you will notice many sunburned coeds (victims of last minute over-exposure at the tanning salon) at the Plex, working hard to get tight in the days leading up to the big weekend. All of this hard work pays off at the numerous on and off-campus costume parties, all of which feature free-flowing libations and dancing reminiscent of Michael Jackson's "Thriller" video. We chose to hit up virtually every option in the Cleveland Circle area, showcasing our costumes on the catwalk at Applebees, Mary Ann's, Roggie's, CitySide, and the more prestigious spots like 1942, 1914, Ignacio, and 5 Ayr Road. Mike was a female senior citizen modeled after the classic Florida retiree complete with lipstick on the teeth, beautiful green sweatsuit, walker, golf visor, inch-thick glasses, old lady perfume & pocketbook, and appropriate bosom alterations. Joe was Hulkamania-era Hulk Hogan and wowed the crowd with his baby-oiled, heavily bronzer'd muscles and spandex booty shorts. Pearcey aka Hulk Hogan was seen at one point autographing the arm of the homeless 7/11 Indian chief, a once-crazy/ heavily-intoxicated man who has recently turned over a new leaf and can now be seen jamming with his new band in and around the Circle. Look for him working the door at the next Has Beens bash.

gongshow@bc snippets:

• Smelly Quad Phenomenom- as the self-proclaimed best people-watchers on campus, we wanted to give everyone a heads up on something smelly going on in the Quad. Over the next few weeks, Quad-crossers will smell a vomit-like stench while traversing the beautifully-bricked center of our campus. Contrary to common belief, the pungent aroma is not from overly-intoxicated Upper-bound froshies who lose their stomach after a long night of punishing Busch Lites. It is actually a naturally occurring stench that comes from the foul-smelling berries of a dominant Quad tree. We think it is called the Ginkgo Biloba. The berries fall off the branch every year around Halloween, and every time one is stepped on, the essence permeates the Quadosphere. We're glad we could clear this up for everyone. Watch your step.
• Door-Holding- At a hilly school like BC, where there is rarely a walk without a gigantic set of stairs or an elevator ride, students must learn how to cross distances quickly while using up the least energy. The Hillside elevator is one the most important resources on this campus. However, we have observed an awkward situation which arises when one rides the Hillside lift. Say I just finish up a Tuscan Cheese and I want to go up to O'Neill Library to check the Has Beens Hockey Club website. 1) I take the Hillside elevator up to the fourth floor, usually crammed in with a kid who I kind of know but can never remember his name, so I throw out the ever-reliable "Therrre he is.." and another anonymous elevator rider, possibly of AHANA descent. 2) the elevator arrives at the 4th floor, and I try to let the other riders out first, but there is a hesitation and we all end up doing the stutter step. No-name guy bumps into AHANA girl, we all shrug, and step out. 3) Thinking we are out of the awkward situation, we look up to see the double doors that go out the back entrance of 21 Campanella Way, leading out to the walkway to lower O'Neill Library. There is two-way traffic at these doors, and everyone is in a rush. 4) I hold the door for AHANA girl, who holds it for no-name guy. A series of enthusiastic thank you's are exchanged. 5) 1.5 seconds later, next set of double doors. Same thing, but the thank you's are a little quieter. Everybody starts looking to see if they can break off to the left or right and avoid the door-holding situation at the fast-approaching O'Neill backdoors. 6) The AHANA girl is doing a fast-walk, and no-name guy has a real long stride. Nobody gains any ground, and we end up in the same sequence as before. The O'Neill doors, for some reason, are very heavy and take a hearty yank to pull all the way open. A quiet "thanks" is muttered by the no-namer and just a "ssssss" by AHANA girl, and this is really starting to get awkward. 7) No-name guy is getting sweaty palms and tries to make a fast break up the right lane to escape the situation. He loses footing on the stairs and falls, dropping his TI-82 and scuffing his Air Force Ones. A cute junior tutoring in the Connors Learning Center sees the whole thing. What a disaster. AHANA girl is playing it cool, surely engaged in a fake cell phone call to nobody. 8) The final set of doors, notoriously heavy because of the air pressure in the stairway. I lean back and pull the door open, holding it back for my new AHANA friend. And you know what? The ungrateful young lady doesn't even thank me. No "Thank You," no "Thanks," not even a fake-thanks "sssss". The final door was the hardest of them all to hold open, and I don't even get a nod of appreciation. Next time she should change lanes and open her own door. My most recent innovation in door-holding is the handicap button. It eliminates the awkwardness of holding the door and hearing the "Thank You's" devolve into "sssss"'s and finally into just awkward silences. Hit the handicap button, and you can step on the gas and escape the situation completely, and the door will be nicely propped open for the next person.
• One last thing- The next time you and your friends (or any group of people) are enjoying a good hearty laugh, pay close attention to the last few seconds of the moment. Following a good ol' kneeslapper, everybody breaks into a series of haha's, AHHHHH's, and hehe's. However, these noises have to end at some point. It's hard to put into writing, but listen hard for the quiet, semi-awkward "ahhhhh" at the very end of a good chuckle. Everyone does it. Once you start listening for it, it's hilarious, and leads to even more belly-busting. Haha, Haha, Hahahahaha, Haha, Ha, Ha, ha, ha, ahhhhhhhh. It's that final "ahhhhhh" which is the best part of any group laughing session. You heard it here first.

As always, thanks for tuning in. We will most likely break the 7000 hit mark with this update, and we want to let you guys know we appreciate all the feedback you have been giving us. Pearcey doesn't even have 7000 friends, nevermind 7000 friend who know how to read.

Special ShoutOuts---> A nice slap on the butt to our readers from other schools: The boys down at Trinity College, we love what you guys have going down there. Camp Trin Trin is truly a great place, with vixens aplenty and good dudes to boot. Same goes to the soldiers at Harvard- just because you guys didn't get into BC doesn't mean you can't keep up to date with our superior social scene. I got great feedback today from the UNH boys, who have been added to our list of college hockey teams who read the gongshow@bc on a daily basis: UMaine (home of Billy Ryan, a dear friend of mine and a true gongshow), Brown, BU, UMass Lowell, Providence, Amherst College, Skidmore College, Northeastern, Conn College, Babson, and the list goes on. Also on the list of our out-of-school readers are a number of professional puck squads- most notably from the Pittsburgh Penguins organization, one-time Has Been and BC Eagle Brooks Orpik, and Scituate native and apple-machine Ryan Whitney. These boys will be in the Bean this weekend, and we welcome them home. We also have an extensive readership within the AHL and ECHL (Neddy H) and we would like to thank all our guys for their support and for spreading the word. You are all true gongers.